Eating Disorders Today

How Long Does It Take to Recover from Buliimia or Anorexia? Part II

       Why does recovery from anorexia or bulimia take years? Because vital developmental tasks must be addressed, and development takes time.

Let’s look at what needs to be accomplished in recovery.

       Eating disorders develop to serve a protective psychological function.

       1.      They protect a person from being aware of what they cannot bear to know or feel. 

       2.      They give a person a sense of control when the person has little real control over what's important to them. 

       3.      They give a person a private island of limited sensation and limited awareness. This is a defense that helps when a person is incapable of preventing physical, psychological or emotional boundary invasion.

       4.      They create an obsessive sense of entitlement to make up for the lack of boundary awareness or the lack of knowledge or skill in honoring personal boundaries or limits.

       5.      They protect a person through numbness and obsessive thinking from knowing what they feel such as anger, fear, disappointment, regret, guilt and shame. A person may even need to block feelings of love, passion and joy if knowledge of those feelings would disrupt the status quo of her environment.

       6.      Eating disorders allow limited but intense feelings to surge within the person and explode out as a form of relief from tension.  These episodes are often highly dramatic and can be both manipulative and destructive in relationships.

       7.      In many situations eating disorders protect a person from knowing she is competent, intelligent, capable and creative when such knowledge might be disruptive to her present life and the imagined (and sometimes real) consequences are intolerable.

       Healing from anorexia and bulimia requires deep, rich and healthy development along many layers of the personality.  When this is achieved the person can cope with the difficult ordinary and sometimes extraordinary challenges life presents without the protection of the eating disorder. Healing also frees a woman to be capable of giving and receiving honest emotions in worthwhile relationships.

       As a matter of fact, healing frees a woman to actually be a woman.

       I’d be glad to elaborate on any of these points.  Please feel free to ask questions and share your opinions and experiences in the comments.

       In the service of easy blog reading I’m trying to keep posts as short as I can while still giving you as much recovery information as possible.

      In my next post I’ll talk a little about some of the work required to heal from bulimia and anorexia.

Joanna Poppink, MFT, psychotherapist eating disorder specialist, Los Angeles, CA bulimia, anorexia, compulsive overeating recovery, www.poppink.com

How Long Does it Take to Recover from Bulimia or Anorexia? Part I

       This is a reasonable question I'm often asked.  Not only can I not provide a specific time, but also I can't guarantee that someone will indeed recover.  And I certainly can't give the answer so many people want, which is days or a weekend or at most, a quick stay in a residential program.
 
       The question is complex with a different answer for every individual. 

       If you are still reading after this undesirable news, please let me talk a little about eating disorders and recovery.

       People develop eating disorders for a reason. Eating disorders help a person cope with living when the person has not developed other ways to successfully take care of herself. 

       Healing has to do with developing a competent, mature and aware sense of self and awareness in the world.  It has to do with restarting stalled emotional development so that the person can take care of herself realistically in the face of simple and complex life challenges.

       How long does it take to accomplish the required developmental tasks?  A substantial period of time from several years to many years, depending on the challenges of each individual.

       But please don’t despair at the thought of the time involved.  Recovery is a process. As you move through time and stages of recovery, you reap benefits as you go.  Your life improves as you gain more health.

       During the healing work, yes, you will need courage to face your pain.  But you will also experience joy as you discover the authentic worthwhile you.

       I’ll write more about the recovery process in my next post.

Joanna Poppink, MFT, psychotherapist eating disorder specialist, Los Angeles, CA bulimia, anorexia, compulsive overeating recovery, www.poppink.com

Professional Boundaries with Eating Disorder Patients: considering right brain studies and work of Dr. Allan Schore

  (elaborating on my comment in Eating Disorders for Professionals Blog)

       Today, happily, we have evidence based scientific research to back up the use of our humanity in our clinical work with patients.

       Appropriate boundaries between patient and psychotherapist are essential in any psychotherapy and particularly in the field of eating disorders.

       However, the topic is often discussed in terms of content:  e.g. a patient asks my age, if I'm married or divorced, if I have children, my religion, if I've ever had an eating disorder.

        I believe that when a patient wants to know about my private life or wants to include me in her private life (weddings, funerals, births, graduations, award events, etc.) that the patient wants and needs a particular psychological emotional experience from sharing the experience with me.

        In other words, its not the information or event that is the issue. The sharing of our humanity is the point. The patient wants to know that she will be understood and appreciated. She wants to know I have a history that will inform me in terms of being present and empathic with her.

       She wants to know that I can appreciate her pain and personal dilemmas. She also wants to know that I have survived my challenges and her stories will not shock me or cause me to judge her. Perhaps most of all, she hopes that I have healed from what she suffers and that if I have healed then she can heal too.

       The valuable experience between us is not content, but right brain to right brain communication.  We use words because we have to. We communicate far more than words, We need more than words to heal and be healed.

       Allan Schore, in his fantastic research on affect regulation, impacts many areas of social science and biology by showing that right brain communication is received by the right brain and actually changes brain structure to allow developmental progress. Developmental progress is exactly what is needed for eating disorder recovery.

       The discoveries revealed by the increased sensitivity of neuroimaging validates what many sensitive clinicians have known for a long time. Honesty, caring, empathy, sharing spontaneous imagery, acknowledging physical responses to clinical material makes for effective connection, growth and increase possibilities for healing.

       The key question I ask before I reveal personal information to a patient is this:  Will my answering this question burden the patient or will my answering support her healing?  Often, when I'm asked a personal question I will respond by saying, "I will answer your question.  But before I do, can you tell me why you want to know or what meaning this information has for you?"

       People suffering from eating disorders have rarely experienced a quality relationship where their boundaries were respected. In general, they know little about respecting boundaries.  Responding with respect and care to their questions helps begin the process of learning and appreciating what personal boundaries are - mine and theirs.

       This kind of communcation also shows a woman with bulimia or anorexia that she can meet limits and caring from a person at the same time. Such an experience is often new and always in the service of health and personal development.

       People recovering from eating disorders need the presence of honest, caring and respectful human beings in their lives.  I believe, with the backing of neuroscience, that we psychotherapists can’t keep true to our profession unless we are true to our humanness.

Joanna Poppink, MFT, psychotherapist eating disorder specialist, Los Angeles, CA bulimia, anorexia, compulsive overeating recovery, www.poppink.com